I feel like I’m starting all over again. After a brief hiatus from the regular TV makeover scene, I’m back at it. The process is not the same since I let my hair go gray two years ago. Trying to re invent, as it were, how I look, when I’m used to looking how I LOOKED is daunting. For years, I had enough episodes under my belt to watch and learn and remake myself in the image becoming to a TV camera, that it became rote. Now, however we have, (gasp) HIGH DEFINTION TELEVSION!! I don’t like it. I look better in person than on TV, and the glory of TV in the past was, with the right lighting, you could look BETTER on camera than in real life.

To complicate matters further, we have wide screens. So my once too skinny and defined face, which improved with horizontal bands of television, has gained in fullness and fluid, which works for me in person, but on camera , I look like William Shattner. I notice every detail from the botox to my eye lid imbalance. (I always noticed the lids, but I actually forgot about it until high def). To make matters worse, my facial issues come SCREAMING out of flat wide screens in across the country. I can hear my clients on the treadmill watching with no sound… “He’s done something, I can’t tell what, but he doesn’t look right.”

Now, this is where someone says “you’re too self critical.” Ok. You’re right. But that doesn’t change the fact that I can see way too much facial information that once passed under the radar.

I really feel for Barbara Walters now

How can I be exhausted, exhilarated, excited and irritated, foggy, forgetful and frustrated but inspired and full of ideas? I don’t know for sure. Maybe if I spell it out I can nail it down. Writing this book was the easiest part of the process so far. (And that wasn’t easy). I mean, at least there is a goal, a date, a book, a publisher, a contract. But, from planning a launch to choosing the fonts and every miniscule decision that goes with each, it seems to be something the author must do alone. (Cue strings).